XKCD Text Replacer

Replaces text (mostly) according to http://xkcd.com/1288/

You will need to install an extension such as Tampermonkey, Greasemonkey or Violentmonkey to install this script.

You will need to install an extension such as Tampermonkey or Violentmonkey to install this script.

You will need to install an extension such as Tampermonkey or Violentmonkey to install this script.

You will need to install an extension such as Tampermonkey or Userscripts to install this script.

You will need to install an extension such as Tampermonkey to install this script.

You will need to install a user script manager extension to install this script.

(У мене вже є менеджер скриптів, дайте мені встановити його!)

You will need to install an extension such as Stylus to install this style.

You will need to install an extension such as Stylus to install this style.

You will need to install an extension such as Stylus to install this style.

You will need to install a user style manager extension to install this style.

You will need to install a user style manager extension to install this style.

You will need to install a user style manager extension to install this style.

(I already have a user style manager, let me install it!)

// ==UserScript==
// @name       XKCD Text Replacer
// @version    1.0
// @description  Replaces text (mostly) according to http://xkcd.com/1288/
// @match      http://*/*
// @require		http://code.jquery.com/jquery-latest.js
// @namespace https://greasyfork.org/users/1858
// ==/UserScript==

GM_addStyle(".xkcd_replaced:hover { text-decoration:underline; }");

var array = {
    "witnesses": "dudes I know",
    "allegedly": "kinda probably",
    "new study": "Tumblr post",
    "rebuild": "avenge",
    "space": "spaaace",
    "Google Glass": "Virtual Boy",
    "smartphone": "Pokédex",
    "electric": "atomic",
    "senator": "elf-lord",
    "car": "cat",
    "election": "eating contest",
    "congressional leaders": "river spirits",
    "Homeland Security": "Homestar Runner",
    "could not be reached for comment": "is guilty and everyone knows it"
};
$(function(){
    $("body")
    	.find("*")
        .contents()
        .filter(function() {
            return this.nodeType === 3; //Node.TEXT_NODE
        })
        .each(function(){
            var text = $(this).text();
            for (var val in array){
            	text = text.replace(new RegExp("\\b" + val + "\\b", "gi"), "<span class='xkcd_replaced' title='" + val + "'>" + array[val] + "</span>");
            }
            $(this).replaceWith(text);
    });
});